Growing Up

I just got home from a long weekend visiting my Daughter and celebrating my Granddaughter's first birthday.  I'm struck by how very fast our children grow and how our daily habits and customs form the women and men we are to become. Makes me think about what I would like to pass along to my grandchildren.

I'm currently reading, When things fall apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times, by Pema Chodron.  Pema Chodron is an American Buddhist Nun. I'm going to give you a taste of the book here with some excerpts from her chapter, Growing up.

"In all kinds of situations, we can find out what is true simply by studying ourselves in every nook and cranny, in every black hole and bright spot, whether it's murky, creepy, grisly, splendid, spooky, frightening, joyful, inspiring, peaceful or wrathful. We can just look at the whole thing. There's a lot of encouragement to do this, and mediation gives us the method...   

How we regard what rises in meditation is training for how we regard whatever arises in the rest of our lives... 

Learning how to be kind to ourselves, learning how to respect ourselves, is important....when we look into our own hearts and begin to discover what is confused and what is brilliant, what is bitter and what is sweet, it isn't just ourselves that we're discovering. We're discovering the universe........We're not just talking about our individual liberation, but how to help the community we live in, how to help our families, our country, and the whole continent, not to mention the world.... 

...There's an interesting transition that occurs naturally and spontaneously. We begin to find that, to the degree that there is bravery in ourselves--the willingness to look, to point directly at our own hearts--and to the degree that there is kindness toward ourselves, there is confidence that we can actually forget ourselves and open to the world.
The only reason that we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with. To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes.  

Then this experience of opening to the world begins to benefit ourselves and others simultaneously. The more we relate with others, the more quickly we discover where we are blocked, where we are unkind, afraid, shut down. Seeing this is helpful, but it is also painful. Often the only way we know how to react is to use it as ammunition against ourselves. We aren't kind. We aren't honest. We aren't brave, and we might as well give up right now. But, when we apply the instruction to be soft and nonjudgmental to whatever we see right at that very moment, then this embarrassing reflection in the mirror becomes our friend. Seeing that reflection becomes motivation to soften further and lighten up more, because we know it's the only way we can continue to work with others and be of any benefit to the world. 

That's the beginning of growing up. As long as we don't want to be honest and kind with ourselves, then we are always going to be infants. When we begin just to try to accept ourselves, the ancient burden of self-importance lightens up considerably. Finally there's room for genuine inquisitiveness, and we find we have an appetite for what's out there. 

May we all strive to face each day with the honesty of children and the compassion of wise women and men.

Carpe Diem,

Lisa

About Lisa Jackson, RN, CHC, RYT-500, AFMC

Lisa is an author, functional nutrition, and functional medicine trained health coach, yoga teacher, and retired Registered Nurse with the mission to "Inspire, Educate and Empower" individuals and corporations to achieve optimal health.

Lisa's book, Savvy Secrets: Eat, Think & Thrive is a self-health book offering her Seven Steps to Optimal Health.

When she is not coaching, or speaking, you can find Lisa joyfully sharing Carpe Diem Dance or playing with her two grandchildren. She is the mother of four adult children and believes, "Optimal health should not be a secret."